Wednesday 10 December 2014

Age of Worry


grown up too fast

I remember Gary Coleman’s character, Arnold, in Different Strokes once said “I don’t want to grow up...”.  A line that has stuck with me over decades, albeit for no particular reason.  Recently I have been affectionately nicknamed Peter Pan and it has got me thinking... “Is my generation in the Age of Worry John Mayer beautifully sung about?”

Am I, like Peter Pan, refusing to grow up, metaphorically, of course?  I mean, I am constantly trying to figure out the world as it changes every day; lovers turn to bitter enemies, friends to foes, partners face-off in ugly lawsuits.  It is indeed a dangerous and scary world out there.  I remember once overhearing a train conversation when a young man said “I don’t want to get married cuz I don’t want to get divorced...” and that was shocking.  He was worrying about an ending before even starting the journey.  I recently read an article about some traits of unhappy people and the common thread with most of the traits was the burden of worrying.  Unhappy people worry a lot and in most cases unnecessarily.
This generation, in my opinion, is constantly paranoid.  The degrees of paranoia vary but we are worried about everything.  Our worries send us to bed and ironically our worries wake us up and chase us out of our houses.  Our worries make us apply for loans we can ill afford to repay, mortgages we avoid to look at and so on.  Our worries send children to school for and ‘education’ we fear may corrupt their views on the world but do so nonetheless for fear of them being left behind in this factory conveyor belt called life.  Our worries keep us in relationships long after their expiry dates afraid of being ‘alone’ and being happy with just that.  Worrying we will be broke and downtrodden, we apply for jobs we wished never existed  but we turn up anyway worried to be reprimanded and sacked.


On a wider community level we worry about the ozone layer, climate change, wars, diseases, hunger, poverty, slavery, sexism, racism, child trafficking, deforestation, animal rights, human and now I’m literally afraid if I continue listing I would have added a new worry on your ‘list of worries’ so I’ll stop with the listing; but you can imagine that our waking moments must be spent in mental rooms choking on the fumes of worry and paranoia.
In all fairness to this generation we have inherited some of the worries from our parents.  They worried about what kind of members of society they’d be raising and channeled us towards paths they deemed fit and development and we in turn will certainly pick the baton and continue the vicious cycle of worry.  We will worry for our own offspring; we would worry about cloud storage accounts being hacked, about religious extremists, revenge porn, the effects of social media on physical human interaction and our children’s safeties online, the incurable diseases of HIV/AIDS, cancer and Ebola.

In spite of this scary storm of despair, let’s look less at the things we can’t help and focus on the things we can help in the here and now; the sun, the birds and trees; the faces and smiles of children and our loved ones.  We can chose to spend more time in the present.

Worry less...
Adieu!

Monday 10 November 2014

Virtual Pub- to be free


After my last post, I'm kinda buzzing from the euphoria of writing again and fuelled by mango-infused green tea and chat with a friend I almost instantaneously wrote this... enjoy!

Virtual Pub- 
to be free

I yearn for evenings and weekends,
when my circle of friends can-
gather around our virtual pub circle of life,
After their days at university lectures,
college halls and bread-winning jobs,
And indulge in intellectually stimulating discourse,
behind their touchscreens and keyboards.
Touching on valid points and smirking lines of-
touché when a rebuttal of wit is made.
Sitting upon our virtual pub stools, and around-
the round table, spilled with endless beers of information.
We bite on crackers of knowledge, chewing nuts of gumption-
and sip on wines of wise lines.
I try to sleep away my afternoons,
so I can hang out at night, defying-
time zones and body clocks,
As we banter away on policies in politics or the latest of our odysseys.
I soak it all in before they retire to rest for the night to-
start their routines all over again, as I the same.
For my waking afternoons-
My muse is the news,
Televised or otherwise...
I yearn for the evenings and weekends...
to be free again in our virtual pub...


Adieu!

Sunday 9 November 2014

The Economics of Church


The Economics of Church


The one constant in life, after the certainty of death, is that change will always happen.  Thing will always change; babies will become toddlers, teenager, young adults and then old adults.  Eyes which could see miles away will struggle to see up close.  Speeches of wit at rapper-like speed will slow down to slow inaudible soliloquies.  Fields of seedlings will become forests of time-tested trees; so in life, change will always come and it is most times a good thing to embrace the change and adapt to it accordingly.
I have now become agnostic after years of being a Christian.  I was born and raised in the Anglican Church, grew up with its norms and customs but after several years of research and soul searching I have come to the conclusion that whilst it did a lot of good in my early formative years, I no longer need formal religion of any sort or the doctrines of a holy book to instruct or guide me through my journey in life.  I am still open to the debate of the existence of the Christian God, but that is for another day’s debate.
Because I have a fairly rich knowledge of Christianity in Nigeria, I will limit my address and my concerns to the churches in Nigeria.  After I moved from Ibadan, Nigeria in 2002, attending church in Wageningen, Holland felt like it was a bible study class in comparison to my previous experiences.  There were no cassocks, no choristers, no obvious physical feeling of being in a church (in my eyes) but I thoroughly enjoyed it.  I was actively involved; my father had given sermons, as did other members of the congregation and some visitors.  There was only one call for offering collection and most of the congregation emptied their €1 and €2 collections with a few €5 notes gracing the collection basket.  Tea, coffee and biscuits were a routine and if you had some Saturday night leftover homemade pastry you often thought of church to bring it to.  Such was my experience of church until I moved to England in 2006 to start university.  By that time, my journey of questioning the essence of religion and the existence of God was in full swing.  I had begun to feel and realise that some of the things the Bible spoke negatively about were in fact the modern society we now live in which I felt the Bible knew nothing of, but I digress.
I attended several churches in my first few months of my stay in Bradford, England and none of them, for different reasons, felt like church in Wageningen.  I often felt I had been judged in a few of these churches although that didn’t bother me much instead it made me critical of the brand of “flashy Christianity” which they purported.
Fast forward to 2013 and I have now returned to Nigeria and I am gobsmacked at the number of churches dotted around the city of Yenagoa.  In a short 3-minute drive I can count more churches than I have fingers; but we have a bloated population so maybe the number of churches is reflective of this population density.  This is an excuse I’m lending and I’m not convinced in the slightest.
Let me home in on the crux of the matter.  The new Nigerian society, in my opinion, is obsessed with two things; wealth and religion, quite an oxymoron, if you ask me, but who am I to say? After all, I am a despised unbeliever, flirting dangerously with the gates of hell, or so they say.
If we examine the weekly church schedules we would notice church activities for nearly 5 days a week.  The Sunday service and midweek service are staples of almost every church.  Monthly activities often include new month prayer session, end of month night vigils, thanksgiving services, harvests, weddings, funerals, child births, child dedications and most importantly, these days, tithes.  In a 12 month period you may also encounter many special occasions and ceremonies like visiting of bishops, archbishops, overseers, self-styled prophets and apostles.  All of which, might I add, have one thing always on the program – offering.
I have honoured a few invitations to attend church and I listen out attentively, the messages always seem to be about wealth seeking missions and a combination of overt and subtle calls for money to God in return for blessings, life, wealth and prosperity.  So I decided to do a little calculation; in a congregation of 100 people, if there are 4 calls for offering and each member put in N50 each per offering, after 4 rounds that’s N20,000 (just over minimum wage) from one week’s Sunday service.  Now I know there will be costs of maintaining the church building and powering the generators and all other operational costs but at the end of the day I wonder where does the rest of the money go?  The pastors and preachers often have book deals, CDs, shows and other media ventures generating their own income so I ask again, where does the money go?  I see clergymen and clergywomen donning the latest fashion trends and telephoning through the latest Galaxy and iPhone devices; their automobiles matched only by celebrities and government officials (and we know we’ll reserve our comments on the latter), so please I ask, where does the money go?
Stardom and celebrity status are now the vogue for God’s earthly representatives.  They say things like “Our Father God is a rich God, he is a king so we are his royal princes and princesses” then I look around the congregation and see paupers and I think to myself that the preacher and the congregation are supposed to be children of the same God and I’m sure he doesn’t see princes and princesses in his followers.  This new fad to be a star is amusing to say the least.  Talks of wealth, mansions and private jets are commonly associated with athletes and rockstars.  High rise buildings, mansions on acres of land and more luxurious SUVs than in a Hollywood blockbuster movie are now the trending habits of Nigeria’s Christian leaders.  The craze for wealth is driving churches to have expensive schools and universities on national and foreign soils amongst other money making ventures.
I can’t help but think that Jesus Christ borrowed a donkey when he rode into Jerusalem.  He didn’t seek out the best Arabian stallion flanked by a chariot entourage and trumpeters, no... A lowly farm donkey was what he borrowed.
The egocentricity and materialism of modern Nigeria has a bitter taste in my mouth and I detest it.  I refuse to indulge in a society that has come to this, but, to each their own and I often remind myself judge not, lest ye be judged.


Enjoy,
Adieu!